Depression: mental health matters!

“Sometimes it is really okay if the only thing you did was breathe”

We live in taxing and depressing times where some people’s cry for help isn’t evident and multitudes drown in anxiety, stress and addiction. Yet “life” dictates that they should suck it up and soldier on, that they should strive to make best out of the dire situations in every aspect of their lives - lest they be seen as neurotic, broken, weak and needy to those around them or dependent on them. This in turn gives depression power over its host because of the restricted avenues where help can be sought.

Instances like losing a loved one, divorce, being retrenched, relocating, “black tax” or trying to effectively manage the work-life balance take their toll on individuals but the society’s disintegration is such that none can talk about depression because they fear being judged, called names or labeled as attention seeking. In some cultures, more so in the black African communities, they may deem you possessed with demons or Satanism when you go through the depression episodes. Plausible as that may be, the fact is that more education and social engagement on this subject are needed to depict depression as the serious type of mental illness that it is - and a very complex one at that. This scourge is vast and far-reaching in ways that most would never comprehend.

At times depression can be evident and frequently missed in the emptiness, the anger, the loneliness, tiredness and mostly the sadness of an individual hence a lot of people drown everyday because of misdiagnosis. The one thing that is very important for everyone to note about the latter is that feeling sad is not depression; it is one of array symptoms of depression. With that in mind, and all else considered, you would agree that it’s insulting for someone with depression to be pigeonholed as sad and told to “go on and be happy” – that’s like blindfolding someone, throwing him or her in deep waters and telling them to swim not drown. How stupid and insensitive is that? Especially when for some, the best comparative to depression is chronic pain – just ponder that for a moment!

“What are we doing to combat depression in the Kingdom? It’s a sickness. It’s a place of vulnerability and access to the Enemy. Been there. Let’s fight.” Jonathan McReynolds

When you are depressed, happiness takes work because you appear happy and carefree one moment and you are drowning in despair the next. You need to be in an environment that understands this. You need a support structure that will help fish you out of that dark place and present you with a lifeline. Plenty of well-known personalities in the entertainment industry (#DemiLovato, #KatyPerry and #MichelleWilliams) have proven that depression is a condition you live with and it does manifest from time to time, no matter how “well” you are or think you are. It does not respect status, wealth or achievements. We all need to comprehend that when depression hits, it hits you and you lose motivation, you stop trying, you don’t trust, you want to forget, you don’t feel like you belong so you think you should not exist or you seek other ways to cope.

On 27 July 2018, heart pioneer and acclaimed Prof. Bongani Mayosi (UCT Dean of Health Sciences) took his own life and his family reported that he had, in the preceding two years, been been battling depression. Someone on social media asked “he is SA’s top cardiologist and he had everything, so why would he commit suicide?” Depression is scary – you push away everyone that means the world to you and you start to hate who you are. It dupes into believing that others are too busy for you, that no one wants you because you are not important. Here’s how you can help someone who is battling depression.

• Be a shoulder to cry on
• Help them in seeking clinical help
• Make them feel that their existence matters
• Encourage them to talk about their thoughts and feelings
• Be patient with them
• Be kind
• Remind them they have so much to be grateful for
• Tell them three things that you are grateful for about them and see what that does

“About 20% of teens will experience depression before they reach adulthood.”

It is heartbreaking that so many out there are going through the same struggles but never talk about it. If you are out there battling depression, remember that you can have good days, great months and best years but never fool yourself into thinking you have beat depression because when you trip, you may have already forgotten how to fight it so keep battling, get stronger and learn to cope. Depression is not a joke!

*SADAG is keen to talk to you or your loved ones about depression. Call them on 0800 12 13 14 / 0800 70 80 90 / 0800 56 75 67

#SickNotWeak #DepressionIsReal #MentalIllness #MentalHealth #MentalHealthAwareness #MentalHealthMatters #BiPolar #SuicidePrevention #SADAG

By S.J. Ngobeni (810111)